Weight Loss Blip

I should be working out right now. I could go to my gym (but I have no work out buddy and really don't like going by myself). I could be doing the workout video that I told my husband I would go upstairs to do (3 Mile walk with Leslie Sansone that I like to do but really can't seem to motivate myself to get up and start). Instead I am reflecting on my lack of personal motivation and wallowing in my highest weight of my life (other than when I was pregnant). I feel disgusting and this leads to emotional eating. Not my finest moment when I scarf down a bag of chocolate whatevers that I find in the cupboard. I am like an alcoholic but with food and especially chocolate. Too bad we need to have food around to survive but perhaps I would find other ways to stuff my face with junk.

I feel like I have not purpose. My spirit is deflated ~ how do I get it pumped up? My heart is aching, my body is growing, my motivation waning. How do I get these things aligned?

I used to be sporty but how do I join a league or team if I haven't played in years? I want but I don't know what or how to get it. Any ideas would be appreciated. What do you do to motivate yourself, have fun with a fit lifestyle and keep your emotions even-keeled and spirit soaring?